Seriously, WHY

MERP

I'm starting to get a feeling that every Wednesdays are not "hump back Wednesday." Unfortunately it is much worse. Luckily I wasn't schedule to work this week because my boss wanted me to "catch up" on everything..yeah that wasn't the case at all.

School was a joke. I feel like Lewis knew that I didn't have to work till Friday night so it found a way to keep me at school every single day. Something always came up out of no where and I had to be there in person to deal with it. I don't think I would have mind so much if I lived on campus, but I don't. I live with my parents/boyfriend which is 30 minutes away from the school. I get the commute isn't far until you calculate all the traffic and lousy drivers on the street. I literally fill up my gas every five days from all the driving back and forth to school and work. I'm so terrified to look at my credit card with all the gas I've been needing to buy. If gas was back down to $1.14 or heck even cheaper, I don't think I would be as worried.

I'm at the point now of having to decided to figure out if I need to cut back on hours at work, get a new job that is closer to Lewis or just become a bum and live life in peace with no worries. As much as I would rather take the easy way out and be a bum, I know I can't. It wouldn't be beneficial for me, my boyfriend, or my parents. It's just sucks that nothing is handed to you and things are just "simple" when it comes to living. Simple to me is that once we graduate high school, we are automatically assigned a career path that we have to take. This career will be able to cover the cost of daily living and spending expenditures for you and your family. You'll be assigned an arranged marriage with your soul mate and a house that is all paid for you to live in with the love of your life.

Honestly, how simple will it be if life was already planned out? You wouldn't have to think and stress yourself out trying to find the perfect guy or deciding on what you want to be. Some would say that life is planned out depending because of their faith or religion that they follow. Being a catholic myself, I don't fully believe in the things that we claim that we do. The mantra I follow is that shit happens and life goes on. If that was God intentions then I'm kind of stuck with it. Like after the last two weeks straight so far has been SUPER TERRIFIC for me.

There has to be a reason why I've been stuck dealing with bad and uncomfortable situations these past weeks. I just don't know what's there to come for me...hopefully something good in return.

Lesson #5: Think of your future goals and make a check off list. The more you check off, the closer you will be to your fuuutttuuurrreee—

Just remember to worry less and smile more